Letting go!

Letting go involves one key step...identifying where you are holding...holding on, holding in, holding back, holding up, holding down. It's only when you find where you are holding, that you can then let go. Keep looking, keep listening, keep feeling, and you will find all the places where you hold.

Change...

What is it about change that scares so many people? Why is it that most would rather stay with what is unsatisfying, rather than shift to something that is possibly more fulfilling?

Change brings up a level of awareness that is confronting and asks us to look at what is. From there we can then decide to stay with what is, if we even have the choice, or allow ourselves to discover new ways of looking, listening, and learning.

Celebrate Yourself!

As we come into the final stretch to the end of the year holidays, remember to celebrate yourself. We spend so much time running around buying gifts, preparing dinners, attending parties, that by the time we reach the new year, most of us are burnt out.

Make this year a different experience. Commit to celebrating yourself starting now. What does that entail? What does it mean saying "yes" to, and what does it mean saying "no" to? Be kind to yourself. Be conscious of what you are choosing as each event and offering is put in front of you.

Wouldn't it be nice to enter the new year refreshed, alive, and ready...rather than burnt out, tired, and needing a holiday!

The Only Thing That is Constant is Change

t's been said that the only constant is change! How do you deal with change? Do you embrace it? Does it excite you? Do you look forward to the opportunities that it provides you? Or do you resist it? Does it bring up fear and anxiety?

We live in a world where change is happening faster than ever. Technology is changing faster than ever, our climate is changing in front of our eyes, our bodies, are changing, our relationships are changing...Change challenges our ability to stay present. Change challenges our expectations. Change asks us to be flexible.

As you deal with the changes that you are choosing, or changes that you are being asked of you, remember that the process of change involves these four principles:

Awareness and acceptance are the first steps to creating and integrating change in our lives.

Understanding what holds habitual behavior in place is key to doing things differently.

Improvement means making a new choice and replacing old behavior patterns with more effective ones.

Reinforcement emphasizes that practice with feedback brings improvement.

Whether you are dealing with addictive behaviors, or yo

Walter Cronkite as a model of Leadership

Here's a wonderful comment about the life of Walter Cronkite from Seth Godin:

At every turn, he acted as if he had a responsibility to his audience. He didn't do the right thing because he thought it would help him get ahead and then one day he'd get his share. Instead, he always did the right thing because that's who he was. No sellouts, no political consulting, no false transparency.

That's the way it is.

Transparency works if it's authentic.

You can only manage your half of any relationship

I'm always struck by how opposites attract. I'm also struck by how attraction turns into frustration over time. It's a fascinating phenomenon that we are drawn to people with different characteristics and strengths than we have. Then we spend the rest of our lives trying to change them so that they are more like us. Ironic, isn't it? In healthy relationships we can only manage our half of that relationship. How much time do you spend trying to manage the other person's half? How much time do you spend managing your own thoughts and actions? What can you do to manage your half more effectively? In order to manage our half it requires a great deal of awareness. Awareness of self and awareness of other. The first step to heightening our awareness is practicing presence. Become fully present in each moment as you observe yourself and others.

Authenticity

I recently read a blog from Seth Godin that I really resonated with. Here's what he has to say about authenticity:

If it acts like a duck (all the time), it's a duck. Doesn't matter if the duck thinks it's a dog, it's still a duck as far as the rest of us are concerned.

Authenticity, for me, is doing what you promise, not "being who you are".

That's because 'being' is too amorphous and we are notoriously bad at judging that. Internal vision is always blurry. Doing, on the other hand, is an act that can be seen by all.

As the Internet and a connected culture places a higher premium on authenticity (because if you're inconsistent, you're going to get caught) it's easy to confuse authentic behavior with an existential crisis. Are you really good enough, kind enough, generous enough and brave enough to be authentically a hero or leader?

Mother Theresa was an atheist, filled with self doubt. But she was an authentic saint, because she always acted like one.

You could spend your time wondering if what you say you are is really you. Or you could just act like that all the time. That's good enough, thanks. Save the angst for later.